January 25, 2007 | 2007年1月25日

生活中的事情细想起来挺有意思。比如我现在，一方面在做慈善，另一方面正在拍摄的电影《刺马》，内容却是讲战争。

每天在拍摄现场和导演、动作导演商量的都是如何“杀人”，如何体现战争的惨酷。那种冷兵器时代的战争，用写实的电影手法表现出来，尤其惨烈。拍完戏晚上回到旅馆的时候，又在想如何帮人，做慈善。就这样，白天在想怎么“杀人”，晚上又在想如何帮助他人，似乎矛盾又不矛盾。

我不知道你们看到这里是否可以理解这种感受？又做善事又“杀人”，似乎有点讽刺。

我是希望，拍电影的时候能放下其他的事情，做其他事情的时候放下电影这个工作，因为两个角色混在一起真的很痛苦。

When you think about it, life is full of ironies. Consider what I'm working on now, for example. On one hand I’m doing philanthropic work and building a foundation. On the other hand I’m shooting “Ci Ma”, a war epic.

Everyday I meet with the director and action choreographer to discuss how to portray killing people in battle scenes and how to show the cruelty of war. In order to realistically portray battle fighting in a period without advanced weaponry we have to create some very violent and gruesome images.

After wrapping production each day, I return to the hotel and start thinking about how to help people and do more things for charity. And so it is; during the daytime I’m thinking about different ways to “kill people” and at night I’m thinking about ways to help people. It’s a contradiction but also not so much of a contradiction I guess.

I don’t know if you can understand what I mean just by reading this. I feel it’s satiric in some ways, thinking about charity work and also thinking about “killing people.” I hope to reach a point when I can make films and just concentrate on that. And when I’m doing other things I can step away from film production. It’s quite difficult to balance to two at the same time.