I love God and music.

I don't know anything other than I love God and music. In that order.

Yesterday I prayed and I asked God about many things, mostly my fears and the flaws I saw/see in myself.

Sometimes when I feel doubtful, confused and uncertain about myself, (oh...don't we all go thru this at times) I'd question God about my selfworth.

The wonderful thing about God is that you don't have to be anything and you know He thinks you're the best. Don't we all try to be good to people sometimes, even our loved ones so that they know we love and care about them? Wow, how amazing that God can still love us even if we did nothing or forget Him in our zealous pursuits in proving ourselves.

My mum can yell at me " Whhhhhhy are you so unlovable when you don't listen to me? I told you a million times to place your files ninety degrees facing the west and adjacent to the line intersecting the middle, with the red labels, and tilted slightly to the concave slant of the holder so that it forms a perfect arch? Why can't you be more lovable and grow an extra ear to hear my beautiful voice as I nag? It is priceless nagging that you're honoured to have."

Okay, maybe mum DID not exactly say that. Hee hee I am just being bad making her look crazy, but you get the picture.

Maybe my chum/girlpal can go " Whyyyyyyy can't you go shopping with me today? I have pms and feel about to tip over with road rage. The shops can't absorb enough of my anger, I'm letting blood spill in the parking lots" Wow, I'm so sorry about the scary pun in there, oops. But the skinny is---- even your girlpal may find you unlovable.

Maybe someone who adores me will have more patience, since it's inherent in adoration to sort of put up a forced sort of tolerance can go " Ohhhhhhh but why can't you like chocolate instead of vanilla, and cashews instead of almonds and brinjal (urgh) instead of zuccini? And I wish you like chick flicks like I do. And why can't you like cheesy /bad music? i love it when the thunder hits me" All of these things gear me up for Miss Unlovable.

But God never says that. He just loves me even if He weren't into rock music and secretly digs hiphop. He'd love me for loving vanilla and placing my slippers 95 degrees instead of 90 towards the east and He'd still think I'm cute as heaven (since God will never say "hell") if I were a brinjal-broccoli hater and even if I woke up like an evil bear with a sore head everyday.

I just love God because I don't need to do anything. And music. In that order. I don't know anything else.