God Reminded Me

It’s been a busy 4 days since my last post. Over the weekend, I had a total of 3 auditions and 2 shoots for Tisch students. It’s been quite an interesting journey thus far, and I’ve been a full-time freelance actor for a grand total of 16 days!

Yesterday, I finally went to get my headshots done. The finalised copies will be with me in about 2 weeks’ time, so here’s a preview of my make-up & hair yesterday.

Yup, the make-up assistant, Yuki, put temporary curls in my hair. My hair looked really nice. As for how I look, the jury is still out. Haha, I think she did a great job though!

Today was a taxing day. I went to a total of 3 auditions & the last one was the most crucial. I went to MediaCorp for an audition for “Incredible Tales”. Yes, “Incredible Tales” again. I remember the last time I went, I auditioned with Adrian Wong for a role in the episode, ‘Bloody Mary’.

This time, I met with Dennis Heng (Casting Director). He actually called me on Saturday, asking me to attend the audition. Apparently, he had seen my profile on AADB, the actors’ database. So at least I had the ‘look’ he wanted… All that was left was for me to perform well at the audition. I auditioned for 3 roles. Hopefully, I’ll land one of them.

But everyday now, I just feel hopelessly disappointed with myself. Because of many reasons. Firstly, I personally think my acting needs lots of improvement & I don’t know how to go about improving except through doing more performances, practising by myself at home etc. I want to attend a workshop, but I need more money for that. Also, I have a natural defect - my jaw problem. I have no problems with my language, but it is an impediment in terms of screen appearance. Sigh.

I guess it’s normal for actors to feel demoralised once in awhile. Every other moment, I question if this is the path I should take in life. 

On Saturday, I had an encounter with an inspiring cab driver on the way to JW for service. He was driving one of the DHL-Formula One cabs. 

When he found out about my job nature, and my dream, he started to encourage me. He shared his mum’s testimony with me about how God answers prayer, and he encouraged me to continue to have faith in God. To say, “I believe in Him”, keep praying & having faith. Nevertheless, I must also have faith in myself and persevere on. Keep working hard.

I believe that it was a God-encounter. In the midst of my busy schedule, God was reminding me to pray and seek Him first. Even the message that day, and the special performance, by2, emphasised the importance of seeking God through prayer. 

Even while chasing my dream, I must keep my eyes on Jesus.

Jesus loves me. And I love Him. And that’s all that matters.