Confidence

I learnt something very important today.

I was asked by my music teacher Feihui Laoshi to a meeting with Avex Asia's staff, together with 3 other fellow schoolmates. He wants to help promoting the few of us to the people from Avex.

Usually this kind of meeting, if arranged by myself and attended just by myself, I wouldn't have any problem. I would be showing my stuff, talking fluently, not be nervous, no hiccups. No such thing as 'low confidence level.'

Today, maybe its the presence of laoshi, maybe its because of my fellow schoolmates, or maybe its simply because they are THE PEOPLE FROM AVEX. I failed to perform. The pressure of having your trainer right in front of you, afraid to make mistakes. The thought of not wanting to over-promote myself to avoid putting down my peers. The structure of the entire meeting being so formal and stern. I didn't feel relaxed at all unlike my other meetings. The fact that my teacher and Avex person kept talking about irrelavant stuffs and cracking distracting jokes.

I lost my confidence in talking.

In fact, all 4 of us did lost our confidence in talking.

My senior Shawna is a very good speaker by nature. Its unfortunate she was seated at the last end and ended up being the last to speak everytime. I think its just human nature, to answer the exact same manner as the person (or few persons) before you when being asked a general question. There's many way to answer a question like 'tell me more about yourself'. I was seated at number 3. The first 2 person answered this particular question with 'my name, my age and my school/work.' That really marked a difference for all 4 of us.

Personally, when its about my turn to answer that question, i was thinking 'should i just follow the format of the previous person on how to answer this question? or should i fill the question up with more information, like what i like, what i do, what are my achievements etc?' 'will it make me look like i'm hardselling myself?' 'will i be putting down my fellow peers? we are here as a team, i'm sure teacher wouldn't like it if i'm the only one who said different things'

I was scared and i ended up answering the same manner. Feihui laoshi, eventually after the meeting, told us we blew our chances. Mainly because of this. There is only one shot. Ask for another chance? No. That will never come again. Just pray if they were impressed with your performance today and if they asked to meet you up again, that's your second chance.

Oppotunities are given only once, Acknowledgements had to be earned in that one and only.

I'm not low in confident level. I'm just kinda lost. I may have blew this oppotunity this time. But its definitely a good lesson learnt.

Laoshi, thank you for all your effort spent on us. Sorry for letting you down after creating such a good oppotunity and none of us grabbed it.

Anyway guys, do visit the link below. Its an online profile for students of Focus Music. Credits to Li Fei Hui laoshi. check out my latest demo!

http://fmstudents.yolasite.com