grow up

when exactly are you "grown up?" or must you grow up?  i definitely feel like i'm falling WAY behind on this whole step in my life.  i feel that way everyday when i float around country to country, without roots, nothing to tie me down, no place to call home...yet it seems other people in my life come in and out, leave and venture off to new things, new lives, while i'm still here...doing what?  this is what i'm thinking at 4:28am.  it really sucks when you can't sleep.  when you want the day to start only to think what am i going to do today?  or worse, to dread what you know will take place...maybe it's not such a good idea to blog when you're half awake?  oh yeah, my question was when do you have to grow up?  act like a mature responsible adult, whatever that means?  not be hurt, be strong, be confident, be tolerant, be wise, be rational, logical, humble, calm, at peace with one self?  when was that supposed to happen? just asking.