Skyward - Day 17 - 2008 May 27

I started rewriting a little last night, and started wondering what the hell I'm going to do with Devon. First off, I don't know why he borrowed money. School? Not likely. Maybe he didn't borrow money... what if he knocked up Ronnie's daughter, and she had a kid that he owes child support to? Something not related to Ronnie's company would make the story a little stronger. Maybe Ronnie lent Devon money outside of the casino, and he's already in the hole with the casino management anyway. Not sure exactly how I'd make that clear. Maybe Sam can explain it while talking to Devon in the car, all while not being too talky.

Then I need to figure out what Devon wants Clay to do. At first it was Devon trying to prove himself to Clay, but it would make more sense for Devon to want Clay to pick up the tab. Clay doesn't want to because he wants to fly, yet when he asks Devon to get the eye chart for him out of the doctor's office, Devon does it. There needs to be some more conflict here. Devon either goes into the eye center and deliberately writes down the wrong letters, or figures out a smarter way to make Clay think he tried to do the right thing but ends up sabotaging him on purpose.

After that, Devon will need to pry Clay for the money, and Clay will be reluctant to give up dreams about being a pilot. That needs to drive Devon nuts, and when Clay talks about how he's paranoid that Jamie's cheating on him, that's Devon's opportunity to lie to Clay about Ronnie seeing Jamie.

This means that I need to drive the paranoia theme a little harder with regards to Devon. In order to Devon to really take advantage of this situation, 1. Clay has to tell him about it early on, 2. Clay should tell him about it right after failing his eye exam and Devon asking him for money, and 3. Devon should propose to find the guy Jamie's seeing. This could be Devon's way of 'apologizing' for Clay failing his eye exam.

Devon's motivation is a little clearer this way.

1. Devon owes money.
2. Devon finds out Clay thinks Jamie is having an affair
3. Devon asks Clay for the money, Clay denies him.
4. Devon sabotages Clay's eye exam, but Clay still denies Devon the money.
5. Devon uses Clay's paranoia against him and Clay confronts Ronnie

Somehow the two need to reconcile at Tussen's place. The big question is how does Jamie fit all of it? It's as if she just sort of sits in the background and does nothing. Maybe that's okay...