I made it.

There’s times when I hear about or see the success of other people that makes me slightly envious.

I know it’s wrong, and as much as I hate to admit it, I know it’s there. I can still feel a sense of insecurity saying, “God what about me?” or I wish something would happen to me. I don’t know if other people struggle with this but, I sure do.

As I was talking to God this morning, He revealed a few things that were on my heart that He wanted to change.

Dad: What is it Ed that you want in life?

Ed: I want to be successful!

Dad: Why?

Ed: So that I can feel worthy or feel like I accomplished something. I want to do this or that and say, “I made it.”

Dad: Is that what you really really want?

Ed: yeah, I want to feel proud of the things that I’ve done. I wanna be a “somebody.”

Dad: So Let me get this straight. You want to say that you “made” it. You want to say that you did this or you did that and have people acknowledge you and say, “Good job Ed!” and after a job well done, you want people to pay you for it? and you want to feel proud about what you’ve done. That is what you want?

Ed: uhh.. sounds about right.. yes. no?

Dad: All these things are fine, success, prosperity, influence etc… but if “you” are the only one doing it. Where does that leave me?

I love God, and how one little word changes my complete perception in life. How the Lord disciplines the ones that He loves. Forgive me for worshipping the idols of Self and Pride. Lord at the end of the day I want to declare the good things that You have done in my life. I want to say, God did this in my life and God has done that in my life. That God is faithful until the end and that WE did a lot of cool things together!