Movie Review: Treasure Inn/財神客棧

Near where I live is a McDonalds and a KFC.

I don’t eat McDonalds, for a lot of reasons. There’s something gnawingly un-food-like about a lot of the things they serve, such that I always imagine some Men-In-Black deleted scene of Jabba the Hut with a 8″ plexiglas tube up his @ss, passing some horrific sludge that is magically transmogrified into McDeath  cuisine.

A self-perpetuating prohibition on eating McD’s is that, to put it kindly, I don’t buy McDonald’s food, I rent it. It reacts so badly with my system that I end up, in short order, acting (if not looking) like the aforementioned Mr. Hut.

I suppose that difficulty could be overcome by eating the stuff more often, but to paraphrase Captain Willard, why the f@#$ would I do that?

The bottom line is that I don’t eat McDonald’s.

I do, however, eat KFC.

More often than I should.

And for more than one wrong reason.

The food is pretty lousy. Even the healthiest (read:non-fried) options are pretty awful. The lovely images on the wall of glistening chicken topped with fresh vegetables  are wonderful. Too bad in reality the food tends to have some disturbing shades of grey in both the meat and vegetables.

Some of the food is good, but only in that totally guilty, grease-ridden manner. So you have to use the scare quotes when you say its ‘good.’

Then why do I eat this crap?

Because the girls at KFC make it worth it. There are several young women who work there at different (but sometimes overlapping) times who smile when they see me and are quite visibly amused at this overgrown lunatic who speaks Cantonese and has an odd insistence on busing his own table, and has more than once, while ordering breakfast, asked quite earnestly what day it is.

I assure you my affection for these girls is not sexual. It is rather simpler than that. I live a remarkably solitary life, admittedly by my own choice. Maybe that’s why I gravitate towards KFC; because it makes me feel nice to be (happily) recognized.

Lots of older (and maler) people recognize me, don’t get me wrong. They just never seem amused. About anything.

Its nice to have someone recognize you and smile when they do. It’s also a rare occurrence for me in my daily life.

So what I get from these experiences is something refreshing, amusing, and aesthetically pleasing. The content (the food) is nothing to scream about, but the presentation and the experience make it worth it.

And that, dear reader, is what makes Wong Jing the most consistent, and in some ways the best local director these days, at least for me.

A quick look back through my recent reviews has shown me that it’s been a pretty bad summer for films in a lot of ways.

The highlights for me, at this point, are a remake of a classic that shouldn’t be shining so brightly and a movie featuring a woman with a dick.

Summer 2011 rules.

I ought to be afraid to admit how much I was looking forward to  Treasure Inn/財神客棧. Because people love to say Wong Jing makes crap movies.

That may be true, but these days its hardly a unique charge. And, uniquely among his co-perpetrators, he will admit that he does it.

And God bless him for that.

Treasure Inn/財神客棧 is classic Wong Jing; cheap, puerile, forgettable, and slapdash.

It is also hilarious, competent, and entertaining for some right and more wrong reasons.

I won’t bother talking about the synopsis.

In the broad sense, this film is a send-up of historical dramas we have seen so often lately. It stars Nic Tse and Nick Cheung Kar Fai.

It also features Charlene Choi, who, as usual/still is too motherf@#$ing old to be acting like a petulant teenager.

Especially considering she’s purportedly a lesbian and a former prostitute. But never mind that.

Hilarity, romance and silliness abound, in a very formulaic, predictable and entertaining way.

I love Wong Jing. He doesn’t insult me. He makes me laugh.

And if I spoke more Cantonese, I am sure he’d make me laugh even more, judging from the audience’s response.

Wong Jing never changes. He is reliable. He never disappoints me.

Treasure Inn/財神客棧 is not a great film. But it was never meant to be. And perhaps more importantly, no one involved with it would want you to believe it is.

Perhaps it is Wong Jing’s refreshing (and sadly rare) lack of hubris that makes me hold him up as a director I really like. He makes his movies, and his movies make money. If you don’t like his movies, he won’t blame you. But he won’t change, either.

When I go see a Wong Jing film, I know what I’m getting. Sometimes there are pleasant surprises. But for me, his films are always good, if for no other reason than they don’t insult, aggravate, or bore me.

I think this summer’s slate of films has helped me make  a decision that is frankly too late in coming. I’ve decided that I will no longer watch films I know I won’t like, especially if they are not local films.

Life’s too short to watch shitty movies.

But that’s just my opinion.